Retail Fishbowl

What's going on in the world right now? I won't have many detailed answers for you. Sixteen hour wordays: opening the store, closing the store, continuing to work after-hours on the infrastructure. Met last night with a local sculptor, Brant Kingman, from whom I have commissioned an installation for our shrine to the Goddess, in the ladie's Boodoir. I hope to hang the artwork of a local painter, Amy Daws. Interviewing potential additions to the staff. I'm trying to book the local Hip-Hop phenom Dessa, for our Grand Opening, but her booking agent has not returned my email (I only sent it yesterday morning.) Fire dancers, drummers, magicians, a guy who eats light bulbs. All while managing the staff, scheduling, making sure the place is clean, the product properly merchandised.

One of the owners just stepped in to tell me it's time to take some time off. Sunday afternoon and all of Monday, likely.

I want to build a monster out of the toy guns in the building. We have a variety, most resembling antiquated guns, as accessories for western, pirate or 20's gangster wear. We also have uzi's, AK-47's and M-16's. The toy uzi is a water gun, the others have a repeating-action sound when the trigger is pulled. I'm growing tired of hearing it. Especially as young boys are most often the ones firing it. I've had too many toy guns pointed at me by pre-pubescent boys to count. Not here, but in my lifetime. Boys who grow up romanticizing war, until they are in one.

Is there not enough violence in the world?

I'm holding it together well, I think. I just keep reminding myself, in those rare times I grow distracted, frustrated, negative - It's a short gig. There will be plenty of time for a life outside work, when my service here is complete, at the end of November. Who can say what will come then; I don't have time to think about it. I don't care, either. I am here, now. A little tired, here, now.

Tired, but there is nowhere else I'd rather be.